Port Augusta's 2020 Elders Golf Classic kicks off today, which is great news for anybody who loves a good round of golf. For others, it may prove confusing, so I've decided to share my knowledge of the sport of kings, and hopefully enhance your appreciation of this five day event.
First lesson: use a club. via GIPHY
I've played golf once in my life, in high school PE. It was compulsory, and the last unit of the last year that PE was a compulsory subject. As a result, I didn't put much effort into it, if you can even learn such a specific skill in just six weeks. We had a good time though, because we were all bad and because nobody in my class took it seriously. On the last day we went to a golf course, shared maybe three clubs, and just laughed. Best day of school ever. It just goes to show that even if you score high and practice no technique whatsoever, it's still worthwhile.
Even when you're stranded on a spooky island, golf is goofy good fun! via GIPHY
It's a Gentleman's Game
My dad used to play the game before he and my Mum split up, and although I never found his passion for it, he still passed on a few things to me. Golf, as I understand it, is a really great way to get out of the house on a weekend, away from your wife and your son who does radio. Being a member of a golf club is very prestigious, even if you never visit, don't own any clubs, and the person at the front desk can't find anybody on record under that name.
I'm betting $0 that he replaces his divots. via GIPHY
I've Seen Happy Gilmore Several Times.
One time I watched it in a hotel! Happy Gilmore is heaps funny as. You wouldn't think Adam Sandler's antics would be welcome on the pro circuit... and they aren't! That's half the fun of the movie. Some people like Caddyshack too, but they're all old. One of Sandler's best.
Oh man, this .gif isn't even from Happy Gilmore. Do I know anything? - via GIPHY
It's Also a Car
Volkswagen make a neat little compact, also called the "Golf". It's a very popular vehicle, one of the top 3 VWs, I'd guess. My friend Lawson Tierney's mum used to drive a VW Golf and it was always a very comfortable ride whenever she'd drive me home from school or what have you. You know what? On second thought, she might have driven a Jetta. It was a while ago.
None of these cars look like what Lawson's mum drove. It must have been a Jetta. via GIPHY
Happy golfing, friends! Hit a "home run" for me!
By Rob Lawry